KEEPING THE DREAM ALIVE … (When others aren’t so confident)

When you launch into something new it can be daunting and downright scary. The future seems so uncertain and it can be a terrifying thought to let go of the past when it has offered such stability and consistency. It can take all of your emotional energy and mental fortitude to start moving forward. But you do, because you know you have to. Deep down, you know that even though it’s risky, there is a small flame that has been lit and if you ignore it, you have a sneaking suspicion you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.

So you wrestle down the demons of doubt, you hold fast to the tiny seed of a dream that has been birthed, you start making plans and you start moving forward.

Then the fear and doubt comes again, but this time it comes from the outside, and often from those we love and value the most.

So what do we do when we share our dream in its infancy, with all its frailties and insecurities if it is met with doubt, suspicion or outright opposition?

1. Question the source… is it actually from a loved and trusted source or someone who has no right to comment? If it’s the latter, shake it off and move on. Caring about people’s opinions of you and your life choices when they have no vested interest in you is a tragic waste of time.

2. Clarify the intention… If it does come from someone you trust then the comment may need further clarification. Sometimes our friends and families make off-the-cuff comments without thinking. They’re not trying to be dream killers, maybe they’re just not thinking before they speak. So ask the question… ‘what did you mean when you said that?’ If it was a thoughtless comment and they’re actually supportive, great, move on. If not, it gives them a chance to express their fears or doubts and you can address them accordingly.

3. Process the feedback … If they have some legitimate concerns, take time to process them. This doesn’t necessarily mean just taking it on board and halting your progress. Rather, process what was said and how it fits with what you’re trying to achieve and adjust if it’s helpful or keep moving forward as planned.